Like sand sifting onto the sheets…
Author: natalie // Category: It's all about me, Life with children, Wedded blissSometimes life gets busted up into fine debris, and I’m happy to have it pass quickly through the hourglass.
MONDAY — Gathered all the dirty laundry on my bedroom floor for sorting. Standing amid piles, I made the mistake of turning a swimsuit right-side-out over Jeff’s side of the bed. No less than a pound of sand sifted onto the sheets. (Yes, the bed was unmade. Sue me.) Since I wasn’t in the mood to strip the bed, I vacuumed it. And much to my surprise, Mr. The-Bed-Has-To-Be-Just-So was none the wiser – fell right asleep without ever knowing the sandman paid a visit.
TUESDAY — Went to see “Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs 3-D” with my younger two. Yawn. Not my type of flick, but it gets five stars for not exposing their impressionable minds to obscenities or any unsavory themes. The highlight of the trip was when I tried to move a straw dispenser over and away from the sprinkle-form popcorn toppings. The dispenser, held in place by rubber feet, didn’t budge, but the cover fell off and hundreds of straws rolled onto the floor. I was mortified, apologized and began picking up what fell on the patron-side of the counter. One sweet, very young, cherub of an employee treated me like an imbecile. Being a semi-public figure, I held my tongue.
WEDNESDAY — I know many are fans of “Dancing with the Stars” and others have spent vacations swimming with dolphins. Me, I’ve been showering with ants. Big ones. They appear to be coming in through the plumbing, and my shower hit peak occupancy just before we got that touch of rain. Before I rinse, lather and repeat, I squash, drown, and laugh as they swirl back to where they came from. (I don’t like squashing insects, but started after one got away and told his friends I was only armed with a loofah sponge. Who’s laughing now? Keep it up, and I’ll put my quadruple-bladed razor to creative use!) I’m hoping the others making their way up will take the carcasses as a warning.
THURSDAY — I’m giving serious consideration to going completely blonde. Ever since I started getting a few gray hairs, blonde high-lights and strategic plucking have handily camouflaged the aging process. I had to stop plucking a long time ago, or sport partial baldness. Now I fear I’m becoming a bit “high-maintenance” trying to maintain brunette-ness. The upside: With such a drastic change to my look, I could show my face at the movie theater again. Hey . . . I could play dumb and possibly be treated like someone who spent forty dollars on seeing one movie!
FRIDAY— Feeling a bit vain about obsessing over my hair, I sank into a deeply depressed state. Does it really matter? YES! Massive caloric intake was in order. Jeff and I made banana splits, crawled in bed and watched some mindless TV while we ate. I’ll worry about my waistline when I get my tresses lined out.
SATURDAY — Middle child said my name should have been “NAGalie” instead of “Natalie”. My initial response was the same as yours: sounds a bit disrespectful. But he and I have that kind of playful relationship. He said it with a huge grin as we were arguing over/discussing the state of his room. While we literally see eye-to-eye because he’s about to be taller than me, we have differing ideas on what constitutes “clean”. When I tell him I’d like to be able to walk across the floor, he hears, “shove the mess to the perimeter”.
. . . So are the days of my life.
© 2009 Natalie Whatley