Natalie Whatley

Now that Thanksgiving is over, let the hustle and bustle begin! In recent years, retailers forced us into Christmas mode the day after Halloween; some sneaky ones started before that. I fell prey to such tactics and in years past gloated over having shopping completed by this point. I wish I could get back in that pattern because having that task out of the way cleared my mind and calendar for appointments with joyful and triumphant. For some, desiring the company of those two is, “no appointment necessary” – if only I could be so spontaneous.

Part of the problem: I’m just not that into the holidays any more. Sad, but true. It’s all become over-the-top and too much for my enjoys-peace-and-quiet, introverted self. Cindy Lou Who, of “The Grinch Who Stole Christmas”, summed it up quite nicely when she told her father, “It’s just that I look around at everyone getting all kerbobbled. Doesn’t this seem superfluous?” I’ll say it for you, “Bah humbug!” It’s just that I’d rather make a special day over something unimportant to the rest of the world than participate in mass festivities; I’m a bit of a rebel that way.

To get through the season with a socially acceptable level of style and grace, I employ a multitude of coping strategies. All the usual suspects are used: exercise (I’m convinced the mental health benefits far outweigh the physical), eating healthily, taking vitamins, getting adequate amounts of sleep, drinking plenty of water,  not overloading the calendar, beating my head against the wall while mumbling incoherently . . .

This year, I researched additional prospective tactics to add to the tool chest as I found myself stressed long before the holidays arrived. An article on the Mayo Clinic website suggests “being realistic and planning ahead”.  Shoot, there’s another problem: I’m steeping in realism, and “planning ahead” (laugh). I try, but with four other people, a dog, a cat, 2 hamsters, 3 automobiles, and a home, the monkey-wrench possibilities are endless. 

Another interesting pointer came to me via e-mail from Dr. Oz’s Real Age Newsletter and caused me to welcome a germ into my world with open arms. Supposedly, I can introduce the inner embryo of the wheat kernel to my oatmeal and it will make me feel less stressed.

Wheat germ contains the phytonutrient octacosanol, which is known to help increase physical endurance and improve the body’s ability to handle stress. From the virtues extolled, one could sprinkle this stuff on just about anything – even glazed, fried-in-lard donuts – and make it healthy. OK, not really. But seriously, sprinkling is for stress sissies; open the jar and dump it down the old gullet. (Maybe have a glass of water handy. I haven’t tried it yet, but it looks pretty dry. And I would be remiss if I didn’t mention wheat germ is very high in fiber. How to put this politely? Well, if the bathroom isn’t a place of refuge, don’t follow the whole-jar advice.)

 It will all be over before we know it, and it’s coming regardless of whether or not the house is decorated and the “perfect” gifts are under the tree.  And I will enjoy numerous things, but I can guarantee not one of them will come with tags, my peace and joy always comes without packages, boxes, and bags!

© 2009 Natalie Whatley

Last Friday marked “opening day” for Christmas gift hunting season. I don’t participate in Black Friday (avoid it like the plague), but know many love the thrill of standing in line, being ushered into a store a few at a time to avoid mayhem, and using elbows as the weapon of choice.  I’ll pass. 

The weeks following Thanksgiving have always been a boon for retailers cashing in on the masses fulfilling Christmas wish lists. Back in 1939 and 1940, retailers begged President Roosevelt to move Thanksgiving up a week to extend the Christmas shopping season.  He did; it didn’t increase sales and made a lot of people angry to boot.  At the behest of many citizens, Congress passed legislation in 1941 forever setting Thanksgiving on the fourth Thursday of November.  I appreciate that.  Imagine the tinkering today for the sake of higher sales . . . why, we’d have Thanksgiving in June if it were up to some.

The Christmas season should be enjoyed for a whole host of reasons: none of which include a single material gift. Consuming for the sake of consuming at the scale we’ve reached is something I have a very hard time justifying. Call me Scrooge, but the holidays are way too commercialized and costly for my liking. I haven’t always felt this way.

Maybe my feelings are derived from the almost 16-year-old counting the days until State Farm becomes his good neighbor at my expense or the fact that the nest egg we struggled to save via a 401(k) is cracked and oozing. The drying yolk has me glued to the nest, and that’s probably not a bad thing. Oh well, it gives me plenty of time to consider various low/no -cost gifting options and rethink my investment strategy.

The economic times we find ourselves in coupled with the fact that no one in my house needs any more stuff has me pondering the maxim, “The best things in life are free”.  There are many gifts we can give each other that don’t cost a thing. As a public service to those who put up with me regularly, I’ll share my freebies.  I aim to assist you in getting all of your Christmas shopping done from the comfort of your home, in a fraction of the time, and at bargain-basement prices. These are one-size-fits-all, and you won’t even mind them being returned.

I’ll start with the man of the house.  For him, I suggest appreciation. He’ll love being recognized for the magnitude of what he contributes to the family and will look dashing in the smile such an offering will surely bring.  (My own field research revealed enhanced cooperation regarding honey-dos, and cost-benefit analysis shows this to be well worth the expense.)

For the lady in your life: a little peace and quiet for herself. She spends a great deal of time taking care of others and needs to recharge her own batteries. If you’re looking to go all out, clean the bathtub and let her use it first.  Those who’d really like to splurge can purchase a box of Calgon for around $3 at most drug stores.  If you can’t swing that one, a meal without any complaints would be nice.  

Teenagers are a little tricky. They need a lot, are a bristly sort at times, and don’t always inspire more giving; I recommend empathy, acceptance and a great deal of patience. Give these, and you’ll actually be giving yourself a gift as well. I speak from experience.

Last, but certainly not least, spend time with your little ones. There is no greater gift, and they’ll treasure it always.  Laugh with them, and most importantly, listen — you’ll be amazed.

This Christmas season, take stock in family bonds; they’re investments that will never depreciate.

© 2008 Natalie Whatley